Earlier this year some friends gave birth to their very first child. The child is beautiful and healthy and the parents are adjusting well. When I saw them last Sunday, they showed off the baby and mentioned they were seeking a "new normal."
I didn't laugh or tease them about that concept. But inside of my head, I thought something like this.
"You're looking for normal? Say goodbye to normal. Normal just took a holiday and left no forwarding address or itinerary. Normal didn't say goodbye. Normal left in the middle of the night. I think I saw normal with your favorite pillow and your nicest suitcase. Normal, won't be sending you a postcard. Normal won't bother to call you collect on Mother's Day. Normal is gone. Normal also ran up your phone bill before leaving. You'll be more likely to find D.B. Cooper and Jimmy Hoffa pulling espresso at your local Starbucks, than to find normal again. If normal were locked in a turkish prison and you were the only one who could get him out, you still wouldn't get a call. The sooner you accept this and stop your denial and bargaining the sooner you can move on with your lives."
Of course, I had the decency to not say anything like this.
The good news is that in twelve months they might have feelings like this posting by Heather B. Armstrong that will make you forget your flirtation with normal. The quote below, from the very last paragraph of Heather's post, resonates with my experience of parenting.
"The world has more color in it because you are looking at it, music is a bit louder because you are hearing it. I never knew how funny a noise could be until you laughed at it, or just how excruciatingly handsome your father was until I saw your profile next to his. I thought that there was meaning in my life before you came along, but Hell if I even knew the meaning of meaning. For the majority of my life I thought I had religion, but never has there been a more reverent moment in my life than walking into your room late at night to watch you breathe, to hear your life in the air. If there is a God, you’d certainly be proof that he or she exists."
-- Heather B. Armstrong, Monthly Newsletter: Month Twelve
